Ladies and gentlemen, it has rained spiders in Brazil. Yes … spiders. Rained. IN BRAZIL.
The land which gave birth to Zumba has now become Stephen King’s official playground. And you can thank the “social spider,” a group of arthropods working together to form a giant web to catch their prey.
Now that’s socialism, folks.
Thank you to 12 News in Phoenix, Ariz. for originally informing me of this (intriguing? terrifying?) phenomenon.
[… Shudder …]
AND IN OTHER NEWS:
**I officially ended the world’s longest eyelash debacle on Sunday. Not sure how this happened, but I wound up with an eyelash stuck in my eye for a MONTH. A month, people. Do you have any freakin’ clue what it’s like to wake up every morning to an eyelash jabbing its way into your cornea, with NO recourse? I poked, I stabbed, I rubbed; yet that dang thing would not budge. For this alone, I think I deserve a spot in the “Guinness Book of World Records.”
**The Black Keys won three Grammys. The Black Keys are seriously the coolest musicians EVER (except for my dad, of course). I saw them, LIVE, with my sister, back in October, and they tore it up. And last night, they won THREE GRAMMYS, which means my El Camino ticket stub is now worth some mula. $$$$ 🙂 (Not that I’m selling it … suckers!)
**Java jam. That’s it, people. Jam made from espresso. A piece of Heaven really does exist here on earth. I may now die in peace.
**My cat peed on his own this morning. VICTORY!
So did you hear about the man who got duct-taped to his seat on an airplane?
No, this is NOT the start of a stupid joke. It really happened … in Iceland. Seriously:
Which got me thinking about the numerous ways we can use duct tape. Like, for instance, back in high school, the battery to my portable brick—a.k.a. cell phone—fell off. Rather than buying a new one, I just duct-taped it back together and walked around like that ’till college.
Because I’m just that cool.
So here are 14 uses for duct tape that I bet you NEVER even knew existed:
- Household bug trap
- Cheap Frisbee
- Do-it-yourself bikini wax
- Band Aid
- Nail polish remover
- Car parts adhesive
- Fat reducing body shaper
- Handmade tug-of-war rope
- Lipstick substitute (seriously, try it!)
- A ball to amuse your cats
- Nose-pore cleaner
- Tin Man Halloween costume
- And finally … silencer for that “God, shoot me now!” annoying-as-hell coworker
So tell me, what are some ways YOU use the ever-beloved duct tape?
Yea, you heard me right. Forget robbing a bank. There really are bacteria that POOP gold.
And with this new-found knowledge, I can’t help but wonder: what would I do if I could poop gold? If each time I plopped down on the toilet, it was payday?
It’d be this weird version of Midas that, quite frankly, I could go for right now. Because I’m a WRITER, and writers don’t really make much dough.
But … back to these awesome, little gold-defecating bacteria.
Not only do these babies excrete the mula, they do it by eating toxic material! You can thank the reputable, respected Washington Post for alerting me to this handy tidbit: “Bacteria that poop gold? Yep, that exists, and it’s in an art exhibit.”
It’s art, too? (Laugh) … this can’t get any better.
Well, I take that back. I guess life could get MUCH better if I knew how to get my hands on some of these nifty little money-makers.
P.S. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!